Aug 19th... Re-test for 'A' Maths... Aug 11th... Biology Semester Test... How to study...?! Really duno how... At least... Thankfully... Off season...

I've failed my 'A' Maths module... Gonna go for re-sit... Failed by 3marks... So frustrating... Struggling on my Biology module as well, as I don't have a gd background on basic science... Working also very physically tired as well, thankfully it's off season at the moment... At this current situation... Not too sure if I shld quit sch, it's so tiring & hard to management... Really scare I can't cope... It's hard... But I have to keep trying... Keep pushing...

If everything's change...
Remember me...
How did I fall in love with u...

It hurts so much... That every time my heart beats... It gave a sinking feeling...
Everything I do... Reminds me of u...

I miss u...

:'(

Congratulation to Baby, got promoted to manager. Keep it up, jia you, :) love & misses...

Why shld I care & concern for her...
Why shld I worried for her...
Why shld I feel like jealous or something else...
Why shld I?

Ans is because I still love her so much...

:''(

I hate to see when u're together with somebody else, cause it hurts. But I hate it even more and hurts so much, knowing u're unhappy and tired when we're together... :'(

Thinking of u in the day... Dreaming of u at night... Hmmm...

wanna...

I wanna hug & tell u, I miss u & love u so so much.

Even I told ya this... guess it won't change anything... As ur heart is somewhere else... :'(

oh my god...

27th May, u decided to take a step back, I'm okay.
10th June, u asked me why we broke that day, because of different in character and barriers between us, and between this time, I still give u my attention whenever u msg me, and u told me that ya got closer with W.Jian?! That break my heart instantly. Since u think he's better then how I'm treating... I'm happy for u as u found a better man.
22nd June, for the first we skype, chat on msn... U called me Baby... U ended the conversation by saying "I love u"... I was like... Blurred... What do u want now?? Can u tell me?

It hurts... But what does it means? Because it's over? Or I just couldn't bare to let her go? What can I do to improve myself to make this relationship better? This question was always on my mind...thinking of her all the time, wondering if she's thinking of me too......

:'(

:'(

:'(

tired...

I'm so tired... Just wanna... Sit down at one corner... Close my eyes... Rest... Don't ever wish to wake up...

got thrown ard at work... till now still not sure which section i'm gonna work at... just like a basketball being thrown all ard the place... T_T

i'm messed up by alot of things... can someone... pls untangle me...?

Reaching in...

i've tried reaching in for u... but there's no respond, it's either "don't know", "see how", or u're out with others.

='(

Efforts...
have i put in enough effort to make things better?
have i put in enough effort to give u all the attention and care & concern?
have i put in enough effort to be there for u? no matter u're sad or happy?

Do i...
Do i get to share ur joy with u?
or Do i just only get to share ur sorrow while u share u joy with others?

Baby passed her driving test!!! happy for her. =) Gd job baby! love ya.

Doesn't mean i can't sweet talk to u to make u happy, doesn't mean i don't love u.

i need u...

i need u to tell me how u feel, so we can move onwards together...
i couldn't be the one always tell u how i feel yet u don't wanna tell me how u feel?
how u expect me to know? i don't guess. i couldn't think deep enough. i'm sorry.
i couldn't afford this, i couldn't afford that. Could u understand my situation what i'm going through? i can only give u my attention & care & support to u, what other needs would u like to have?

can u pls tell me how u feel?

7th May - Angry? Disappointed? Sad? Confused?

if i tell ya this story, how would u feel?

On the Thursday night, i asked Baby if she's free to meet up for lunch. No need for her to travel so far out, i can meet her up at Tampines Area, to spend time with her & have a gd meal before her sch graduation prom night. She say have to see what time she woke up the next morning. i say okay, let me know. The next morning, i woke up early knowing that i don't have enough slp for the past few days, i make an effort waking up early to wash up prepare my stuffs, as when the moment she called, i can straight head out without wasting any precious time. I woke up at 9am, wash up packed my stuff and waited for a her call anxiously. Past noon, no msg/call from her, i msg her 3 msgs & no reply for the past 1 hr. I've waited till 1pm plus, i make the initiative to call her. When she pick up the phone, i ask her if she's free to meet up for lunch. She said she's having lunch with her mum, i was surprised. My heart had a sinking feel, very sad. i said ok, u go have ur lunch then. Then i msg her to have a gd meal. She replied saying "sorry, didn't have the time to msg when i leave home, sorry" when i see that, i replied nvm. she replied me a sad face symbol. i didn't replied, i was very disappointed. so sad that she gave this kinda excuse. For the past 1 hr, u holding on to ur phone not knowing ur phone rang??? i breakdown, cried. why did i cry??? why??? can someone tell me??? didn't slp the whole night that day. too sad to do so...

now how would u feel if u were me?